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For past few days, I am very seriously toying an idea to adopt a baby girl. My apprehensions about a marriage has nothing to do with this. Marriage may happen or not because I have decided to harden my stand about the criteria of bride and I am not going to buckle to the peer pressures. I don't want any compromises or 'work later on' in my spouse. But I can't wait to be a father soon as I feel that I can be a good father. I am not doing a favour to a baby girl by adopting her instead she is going to favour me by bringing a wholeness to my life. Ofcourse this process will take some time but I have already started keeping some money aside for baby's account, and definitely this adoption should happen within an year or two.

I am very well aware of the hardships a single parent face in India. Infact it is very tough to  convince my parents to accept her wholeheartedly as a part of our family. Once you get the support of your family members regarding this issue, half of the battle is won. I'll cross the bridge when it comes. If this itself is an uphill task, then my aspiration of starting an orphanage few years later will be still more a hard task. Even though this thought was germinated long back, the recent tours to various parts of Tamil Nadu past few months did trickle this thought seriously. The gap between the rich and poor is widening exponentially day by day.

We in Metroes, are competing with our neighbours, friends in cosy lifestyle, deep paychecks etc., talk about salaries in lakhs at ease, but the reality in rural Tamilnadu is otherwise. For many people Rs. 50/- a day is more than a dream. Those very sight & interaction with them disturbs me a lot. We must feel blessed when seeing such people. I feel the itch of giving back to the society. When I watched 'Swades' again today, I felt very closer to Mohan Bhargava.

{mosimage}Not many people are willing to venture in this area because we people have a problem in the very basic mindset of thinking for poor. When I talk to my parents and relatives about the status of my clothes/books/belongings earmarked for sharing with the under privileged people, they said that many people are hesitant in taking the old things despite being poor. They termed that instant as "attitude (thimiru) despite being poor". Here is all we make mistakes. Even though deprived of material comforts, most of the poor people have a strong self respect, which sometimes can be irreasonable or comes by misunderstanding also. We, the donors, expect the recipients to be meek, poor self respect in the name of humbleness or broody. But they too are humans, have their share of happiness, fun.

When we see the rag pickers & menial labourers having fun, we tend to comment "Do they have any worries about life?". If they refuse to take your offerings the immediate comment is "They have attitude upto their sleeves". Please note that you are helping them, so don't treat them as garbage bin by dumping the waste things. I had seen some of the 'donated' clothes closer to rags, so why should the poor people accept it without self respect. These under priviliged people doesn't need materials alone but a sense of acceptibility. So the good thing is that we must not think on what we had given or whom we had given once the materials is disposed.

Recently Vaithy sent me the details of his friend Jagadeesh, an IT professional, who had just started an orphanage in Coimbatore. It takes a lot of guts on Jagadeesan's part to start it because it is a commitment he is making for not only his life but to the adopted kids also. He had become a hero looming large in my eyes. Hats off, Jagadeesan!

I know I am not a super hero to eradicate the poverty in a stroke or help all the underprivileged people in the country, but all I can do is to make a difference to few people in my life. I reiterate that I don't want to paint myself as an ascetic samaritan but if I could create an awareness about caring the under privileged to people around me, I will be happy.

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About myself
Maheshwaran
Author: MaheshwaranWebsite: https://www.maheshwaran.com
I am a SAP Consultant in my late 30s, residing in the happeing IT City - Bangalore. My interests vary from reading to travelling to handicrafts to photography. My latest interest is on Body building. May be this vivid interest keeps me going in my life without getting bored.

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